Passivity can often be masked as a proud portrayal of humility or spiritual surrender. We must often take note of the origins of stagnation, disinterest, and even our rationalizations for not taking steps towards our personal goals. The greatest enemy of progress is not to be found outside of ourselves but within the ignored segments of the psyche. We may find reasons for our lack of execution of a particular task within the immediate environment, but these are only projections or excuses for our own resistances. The environment as a blockade to progress only becomes a relief, a deflection for taking responsibility for the abandonment of our life goals. It is much easier to attribute a lack of time for not working on a project than to face the suppressed reality that we fear stepping into the unknown world of creativity- it is the fear of our own potential that must be dealt with daily, many times from moment to moment.
I have often encountered people that must make a definite change for the sake of their well-being, as continuing on in a particular behavior will inevitably lead to destruction, and have found that underlining their interpretations, they are profoundly terrified of their highest potential. It is not a fear of failure that keeps us in misery but rather it’s a fear of what we can possibly become if we took initiative and pledged to set out to accomplish what we desire. We may hide behind a passive life and settle for mediocrity but in many cases this can prove fatal. People thrive from striving, competing, and improving themselves. Giving ourselves excuses to continue hiding behind messages of “accepting one’s lot” or success equates trouble and evil, is a deliberate sedation of truth and life. A patient I once treated who had a history of multiple overdoses, often victimized as a child, also victimized herself as an adult. She once decided to leave treatment, telling the staff she did not care about her recovery or her life in general. With tears in her eyes, and words that disarmed the staff with pity and shock, I looked into depths of her being and said “of course you don’t care, it serves you well… if you did care then you’d have to look honestly inside yourself and see what’s wrong, take responsibility towards improving your life and making something of your existence. It’s so much easier to not care, your addiction loves that you don’t care because if you did you’d probably become someone you’d love and care about, and in turn people would be drawn to you and love you.” She was able to digest my words without running away and thankfully continued her treatment. It’s so much easier to live a passive life but it’s also the hardest and cruelest thing we can do to ourselves. We destruct under the guise of meekness and never discover the hero inside of us. Keeping our “excuses” for not taking responsibility within our awareness can be frightening and overwhelming, but once we commit to doing so and carrying on, we will prove to ourselves we are more powerful than we could have ever imagined.